Prejudiced CHRISTIAN singles

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Remaining single is always more challenging than being in so called “In a Relationship” and being married every where in the world when it comes to prejudices.

In USA and other western nation, such single person are in risk of being prejudiced by society, institutions and grown ups as homosexuals, lesbians, transsexual and whore-monger.

GOD knows what people think of devoted Christian singles.

Here in Nepal, remaining single has prejudicial problems.

Single’s challenges in Church 

The churches in Nepal think singles are inappropriate for ministries especially pastor, missionary and evangelism. The one who does not have ability to start family is unworthy to serve church ministries.

Single man gets into constant trouble with single girls. The young single girls are seeking for a possible relationship to result in marriage and family start up. The youth willing to discard  interest of young beauties worsen spiritual fellowship.

The leaders try to work as middle man for marriage between singles, but when singles  repeatedly reject the choices, leader and congregation avoid good conversation. It’s like blackmailing singles to marry to have better fellowship with congregation.

Christian singles are in risk of getting in relationship with unbelievers due to prolonged lack of christian couple relationship and repeated rejections. The christian singles fill vacuum of loneliness by spending time with worldly people often resulting in love affair, marriage, abortions and backsliding.  It usually start with casual dating.

Single’s challenge in Society

Whenever a rural young teens and adults travel to Kathmandu-capital of Nepal for higher education, occupation and training, they have tough time to room rent.For house owners young rural singles are not good client to rent apartment. As a result struggling singles spend time on hotel rooms, streets, bus station and parks until they get a room on rent costing above Rs 5000 per months.

They also face judgement from their native locality as possible predator of sex to young girls. The rural girls usually don’t speak to such unmarried men and try hard to avoid them by preventing eye contact and communications.

In Kathmandu, house-owners owners fear young single adults may trap daughter in laws, daughters, wives including the pretty young girls in the localities with affair. House owners will ask, “Are you married and do you have a family?” if you say no, they will tell you “We don’t provide rooms for singles.”

Singles usually face the prejudices from their own locality as whore mongers, drunkards. party lovers, drug addicts and loiterers if they remain single for a long time. On some level they are true by believing many singles are whore mongers but that has led them to generalize every singles as whore mongers.

Pressure for marriage

Due to such prejudicial problems  young singles feel pressurized for marriage and family start up. Many relatives, teachers, friends and family members constantly torture young singles for marriage despite financial crisis, unemployment, insufficient higher educations, skills and maturity.

Many educated, professionals, experts, colleagues, married couples and romance couples undermine singles with view of loner. To them, singles are not well in mingling and understanding people.

They tell, ” We know you are very lonely. It’s time you should have relationship and marry to understand people.”

By just experiencing this type of prejudices we come to know how people prejudiced single Jesus Christ during his ministry.

The Son of man came eating and drinking, and they say, Behold a man gluttonous, and a winebibber, a friend of publicans and sinners. Matthew 11:19

 

 

 

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12 thoughts on “Prejudiced CHRISTIAN singles

  1. This is tragic. Christians who have devoted themselves to singleness for the sake of the kingdom should be rewarded with joy and supported. The mission field can be brutal on a young marriage and waiting to start one is wisdom, not foolishness.

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    1. Ya..and marriage is a blessing, a grace it needs a different level of GODs favor..because they have difficulty in dividing the devotion for GOD and Family. It two responsibilities…it’s safer to remain single unless GOD;s brings right person in life as you have said…instead of being frustrated for marriage due to pressures, stigma and other falsehood!!!

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  2. Important message.Thanks for sharing this. Didn’t realize how wide spread the prejudice against single people is. I have been singe for many years now and I am happy. I have been told that I need to put myself out there but I disagree. If God wants me to marry then it will happen but I am not on a manhunt. I have less distractions as a single person and can focus more of my attention on God as a single woman than if I had the responsibility of being a wife. I have been called cold and frigid.That I am just to walled in and that I need a man. A man could fix all of my problems. Single people seem to be shut out of so much. Some dismiss me because I am not only a woman but single. What could I possibly know? I know my life isn’t perfect but I have a love more true than any man could ever love. Jesus loves me. He chose me and He is in my heart because I received Him as my Lord and Savior. I didn’t have to get married to get His approval an if I were married He would still love me just as much. Married or singe I am no better a person or less a person. I am who God sent His Son to redeem. Paul spoke about marriage and remaining single. Bible.org has a good article on this topic you might enjoy reading it title single-minded
    https://bible.org/seriespage/18-single-minded-1-corinthians-725-40

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    1. Some people make me laugh when they say they feel complete when they have spouses. But i am with you. We are complete with CHRIST. Also married couples cannot concentrate on ministry effectively with contrast to singles. If married couples want to be effective, they should both agree to work in ministry for the LORD with full dedication by forsaking the pleasures of the world. They are less productive as they spend less time in reading words, praying and fasting. Much of their time is spent on meeting the needs of the family than focusing on Creator and they usually depend on family than of GOD for solving problems. I have seen married couples trying to minister.. either of the spouse is weak or strong in LORD but they don’t be at the same level because atleast one of them busy working in the fields with much trouble too meet the needs of the family which leads to spiritual drought. We can just remember in the case of Job and his wife, Abraham and Sara, Jacob and his two wives, Michal and David..foolish Nabal and Abigel.

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      1. It is so refreshing to meet others who understand that Christ is first and most important relationship. If the day comes then those that understand this will make better mates as long as both truly put Jesus first and have a firm and mature relationship with Him. Paul was clear on the troubles married people face and how these burdens can be distractions. I don’t believe any of the apostles were married at least it is not recorded in the Bible and since they spent their lives traveling from town to town I don’t see how that would have made marriage possible. I have freedom to go where God calls me as a single person that a husband or wife does not have, and if God calls me to intercession in the middle of the night I don’t have to worry about waking up a husband. The only one I need to please is God. It is the perfect relationship, He is faithful, never lies, is always there, lifts me up when I am down, encourages me, protects me, provides for all of my needs, loves me better than anyone on earth and I never need to worry about losing Him. God bless you and continue the good writing.

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  3. Ya..u r right…marriage has lot more seriousness…educate ourselves,,,,work…love…marry…rear children…and we can’t do this if there is no grace of GOD…but still many married couples do forget that grace and is driven off the track to make more money and wealth instead of satisfied with simple life and high thinking…Jesus doesn’t want sophisticated life for us unless blessed as Joseph or Daniel with busy schedules who continued to fear lord, pray three times a day but that was different lifestyle from priesthood..there were priests and levites who enjoyed marriage with counterparts willing to support the priesthood ministry…..these days we have some commercialized Christians who mix spirituality with worldliness.. .it’s like they are living two way life: priesthood, common people or even royal hood. People can’t really be three at one point in life. moreover many desire each others fellowship than GOD’s fellowship..guess what these type of people always end up teaching, guiding, leading with the lack of knowledge, revelation because they are not equipped for such double or triple life,,even Jesus wasn’t equipped for such life…Almighty Jesus stopped family responsibilities when he started ministry, depended on wealth of wealthy woman, did not have place to rest, birds had nest, foxes had holes…he was hungry and tried to feed on the fig tree on the roadside…slept in disciples houses,,ate in tax collectors houses…and it seemed some really self smart people have been deceived for a longtime when they thought they should not emulate such life,,if they really want to serve JESUS…i think singles have more easy path of simple life and high thinking if they really want to serve the LORD and unless they get suitable mates like Rebecca or Rachel..we know Issacc, Moses, Joseph from 30-40 yrs…It is assumed that Jacob was about 84yrs old when he first married to fulfill GOD’s purpose…These days people have misunderstood the context of marriage…these days it’s like people have plan of their own,,,study, carrier, marry..affairs…child bearing and that’s it..for some it doesn’t even matter about devoted christian mates…they are ready to marry anyone just to avoid the difficulty and commitment of single life.

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  4. A very interesting post. I agree that Christian singles have a place in this world. The focus on Christian families is certainly worthy. But, as you say, those who do not marry have greater liberty to serve others. Even Paul held that view.

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